1. |
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Why do we hide ourselves?
Bodies in constant twists. I’d rather keep the shades drawn
‘Cos all that light does is burn.
I’m not myself. It’s something new around
I can’t shake the stress marks
The fear my heart won’t warm to.
Too caught up to see the opening. It’s not enough anyway if we don’t learn -
We can’t overcome suffering without an opening
So, let it all out. Just let it all out.
Follow the rain to the reservoir
Just let it all out. Let it all out.
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2. |
Elemenohpea
03:33
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Settle. Collect your temper
I got a kick when you said “fights come with the worst charm”
But no one wants church these days
And we’re short a dare for starting over.
I watched you figure it out. This is as good as dead
Shut our mouths off from the water
Your fire is gone.
No surface left for the sediment
No surface there if I look for it.
Setting traps off in the dark. I’m here to pass the time -
To distract from the weight of what’s building over me
I shadow the feeling. Like empty space the stomach cannot digest.
Our best years weren’t called for.
Sell up. I’m not being caught out again (do you tell yourself?)
Afraid to take the bandage off. To start is the hardest thought.
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3. |
Million
02:49
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The words I’ve said
Drag around my head
Wasted days creeping in.
The friends I take for granted. Nothing’s tailor-made
Call it in
Million.
What’s my colour? Where’s my honour?
I’m still working at what is mine.
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4. |
(Keeping House I)
01:12
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5. |
The Ladder
04:12
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Two heads are calculating the minds I’ve been taking
And we’re alright. All swings and roundabouts
Cuts on my palms from the first game.
I’m getting good at letting life distract me when I’m around
Just got to be part of the story for the point of tragedy
Then sleep through the best parts.
I can’t amount to anyone.
End of 2012. Dug a new hole, somewhere I wasn’t something
Where I’d be better for it
So funny how the other ones wash up, drawn in
I’m sure a tide is against me. But where do I find the time
To get beyond what is hanging on?
Two heads stopped talking today
(Two pasts you can’t erase).
I knew enough to get it wrong. What’s the pattern?
Man, I’ve got enough to get wrong
The what comes after.
No one knows how I’ve been had. It’s getting harder to mask that
I’m willing to swap out the shame for a date with the praise
So long as I keep something better at bay.
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6. |
Selfsame
03:40
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Mark a jar with half the measurement
Be the stray bullet, a fly for the ointment
I’m happier now that you’re disappointed
Sometimes I’m not enough of a let-down.
When help comes around, why be the one that floats?
I thought I was beyond this phase, but I’m nowhere near
Growing less every Spring
Pared back the self that’s closest. I can’t get to know him.
Damned to half the measurement.
Same. The humour in coping
Is how we claim to have it all worked out
I mistake a same for a change.
Same old ways of coping (old ways bring out flaws we haven’t beaten)
Mistaking the same familiar person
I mistake a same for a change.
So nervous, I can’t talk to no strangers
If they see madness in my mind then it’s all I’ll have been
A jar stable enough, but only half the measurement.
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7. |
Sail Maker
03:54
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I only move away so I don’t have to carry your resemblance.
A penny per thought of self-betterment won’t teach you methods to save
Pay it forward. We’ve no more struggles to abuse
You can’t pitch an anchor to my floor (I don’t live anyway. I stop only to wait)
My face is the face of someone worn.
I steady small actions. Too steady for my good
(It’s not that I’m here. It’s that you know)
Familial distress is all in the name.
Selfish and unaware. You never looked out
Don’t think I’ll ever look back
I’m selfish, but I’m aware it’s the only thing I’ve felt.
Made to fall
What makes you hesitate? Tell me just once that you’re proud
Fold my fingers through the dirt, breaking just enough to make it out
Doors go both ways. I can’t tell if you’ve aged in this light.
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8. |
(Keeping House II)
00:39
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9. |
Where the Clouds End
02:21
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The strain on my health
The bad we latch on to
I think I’m done.
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10. |
Fold
07:17
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Trouble hates an architect. I lost my way
I’ll call it once
Calling twice will bore me
And how could I sell it, spent on heartache?
I work to sit around
Just another skeleton cluttering the closet.
Only so long that I can concentrate on what’s missing
Helpless to the fold
And then it’s gone. The worry is over
What I give to feel less somehow.
Remember wanting what I want to throw away, haunting the things I’ll save
Desire’s a fever I just sweat out
A waiting game, older with each attempt. Yet we wait.
Yet I also wait -
For the courage to hit reset and steer new strings
I keep walking straight
Back to where I am.
We always know more of our monsters than ourselves
What I’d give to know less right now
I’ve always known.
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I Feel Fine Brighton, UK
DEBUT ALBUM OUT!
ifeelfine.lnk.to/thecoldineveryshelter
Nathan, Antoine, Joe & Jack
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